:: white dwarf ::

:: Thursday, October 14 ::

maybe i should have applied myself in school...maybe if i didn't do the bare minimum amount of work...

i just believed in the future i would be rich. i never thought exactly how i'd get to be rich though...my family isn't rich...i've never invented anything....

actually, wait...i did draw up a design for a vehicle that skimmed across the tops of trees when i was 9. i called it the "tree skimmer". it was powered by bouncing off trees. i just knew it was going to revolutionize the entire transportation industry...

or maybe i was going to get rich from the piece of dried glue in the shape of a bunny rabbit that i found. at least i thought it was valuable enough to save for years in my underwear drawer...

what the hell is wrong with me...

:: danny 8:03 PM [+] ::
...

horribly hung over...
i'm trying to figure out how to sleep at my desk without anyone noticing. its not going very well.
:: danny 12:21 PM [+] ::
...

umm...
my coworker just caught me talking dirty to a tin of cookies. i was just really happy to see that there were some left to eat. i'm sure 3 hours of sleep also had something to do with it....
:: danny 6:01 PM [+] ::
...

while i was getting lunch...
a business man walked into a blind man on the street.
business man - "sorry, i didn't see you"
blind man - "thats ok, i can't see shit!"
ahhh, what a country...

:: danny 2:28 PM [+] ::
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written on a jar of olives i'm having for breakfast.
"not a significant source of saturated fat, cholesterol, dietary fiber, sugars, vitamin a, vitamin c, calcium and iron"
um.....no shit dude.....they're olives.

:: danny 12:46 PM [+] ::
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just a few things...
mandles - if you're a man you should not be wearing sandles....especially if you don't cut your fucking toenails.
tattoos - if you're an overweight woman you should not have a tattoo of mickey mouse on your cellulite ridden calf with the name "armando" written in script in between his magical gloved paws.
tattoos2- if your name is 'mike' you should not have a tattoo of your name over a 'nike swoosh' logo on your arm, no matter how clever you think that is.
odor - if you are fat and/or hairy & its hot outside you will smell bad. i'm sure this is nothing new to you, you've probably been smelling bad for a long time. use some deoderant. thanks.
i guess the f train is getting to me...
:: danny 11:42 AM [+] ::
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false advertising.
when i was young i would watch tv and look up to kids that were "older". only then i didn't realize they were 30 year old actors playing high school students. i would think, "wow i cant wait till i get to high school, so i will finally have muscles". i figured its just a matter of time before they developed. well, high school is long gone. so is college. and i still have the same figure i had when i was 9. very disappointing....

:: danny 1:14 PM [+] ::
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